Category Archives: cancer

Five on Friday/Frugal Friday

Posted in budgeting, budgets, California, cancer, Credit cards, frugalism, husband, knee injury, Multiple myeloma, Myeloma, velcade, Walking by

Frugal-wise, I’m not in the Cotswolds like Mavis over at $100 a month. She probably should change the name of her blog. But she’s got the money, so why not enjoy it? Plus, she loves England.

Here in my neck of the woods, N. Ca, it’s been too hot to do much outside. The temps are much nicer in the coming week, but still some 90’s, and I saw it gets in the low 80’s, so that will be much nicer. I miss sitting outside in the mornings and afternoons.

Money-wise, just paying bills, and I had to pay the overpayment from SS. It’s ok, I’ll deal with it. It’s done, and I’m going forward. I just need to work the budget with the SS I’m getting. I’m still working on my credit card bill because I put the cremation on there. But I should be able to knock it down next month. I hate having a balance. But needs must.

After my Velcade shot, I stopped at Costco to pick up some lox for the bagels I bought at Noah’s. I also picked up some rose wine( my favorite) and a Gloria Ferrier champagne-type brut. I wanted Mumm rose, but they were out.

I gave my daughter $100 in cash to buy the paint for the studio. She’s really done a great job clearing it out and rearranging it to suit her. We might go get that today as long as she drives, since I’m on Dex. I don’t sleep well on Dex nights, and last night was no exception.

I also have a food bank donation to drop off and some more stuff for Goodwill.

I’ve almost finished most of my list of things to do related to B. If something comes up, it’ll be an outlier I don’t know about. I may take care of a few things today or not. It depends on my focusing on which Dex does affect. So we’ll see.

I’m still debating getting the next steroid shot for my knee. Mostly it’s ok. When I try and do a little extra walking or swimming, it acts up, but then I seem to recover the next day. The shot did help quite a bit, so there’s that.

Simple Sunday on Monday

Posted in Blood test, books, California, cancer, Death, Myeloma, reading, Uncategorized by

This heat wave we’re having is doing me in. 96 yesterday and the same for today. Ugh. I think a bit of a cooling trend starts on Tuesday, but it’s not huge. I read all my library books, so I picked from my shelf some old Hillerman and looked through some decluttering books. You know I’m desperate when that starts happening. I do plan on going to the library tomorrow so I can get my hold and a few others as well. I was planning on going on Thursday after my Velcade shot, but my hold expires by then, so I need to get it before that.

Menu planning is still hit or miss these days. I still have the basic menu plan going of using things from the freezer and fridge, but I’m not super motivated. It’s probably a combination of the heat and just finding a new ‘normal’ balance. My daughter bought an air fryer on Prime Day, so she’s been experimenting with that. So far, she’s made sweet potato fries and wild cod in panko. Both excellent.

Sunday- used up a bag of Trader Joe’s chicken chow mein with added chicken.

Monday- Tofu something as I have 2 containers to use up. I also have some broccoli to use.

Tuesday- I’ve been feeling like crock pot pintos, so I think I’ll do that with tortillas and avocado if they’re ripe. I bought the bag(6) from Costco. It takes a while for them to ripen, but as soon as they start to ripen, I put them all in the fridge and they will last weeks in there.

Wednesday- I think we’ll do spaghetti with marinara and maybe some meatballs.

Thursday- Freezer meal of some sort. I need to go out to the chest freezer( that’s in our outside laundry room) and check.

Friday- I’ll make a pizza if it’s not too hot.

Saturday- ?? TBD

Today I’m going to meet my library friends for a coffee. They have been very supportive, and the one gal is the one whose husband died of Myeloma a few years back. His Myeloma came on very fast, he was in his 80s, and Sutter really didn’t address his issues or treatment till it was too late. It was very sad.

All in all, things are ok. I’m still cleaning out B’s desk of odds and ends, like pens and notebooks. Nothing major, just a little at a time.

I have my Velcade shot this week and then Dex days. Actually, the dex isn’t too awful when I do it between 2 days. It’s still Dex no matter what, but it’s less intense. Then I’ll go get my labs next week.

Friday Things

Posted in budgets, California, cancer, Death, frugalism, husband, peritoneal mesothelomia, Uncategorized by

I’m still processing things from Barclay’s death. It’s very weird, honestly, to be the person left to keep on going. I take some comfort in that he lived a good life and got to be 74, almost 75. Look at those poor kids in the Texas flood who didn’t get past 10. Very sad. The last year has been so hard watching his decline, and the last 3 months were pretty awful. He really didn’t have a chance with peritoneal mesothelioma. It’s just one of those cancers that you don’t get over and go into remission. I got the letter already from SS, which I’m happy about, so I don’t have to go into the office. I’m losing over $1000 a month, so quite a hit. I’m sure there will be ways to figure it out. I cancelled his UHC, so that and his Medicare covers almost $500. Insurance is outrageous. The rest, I don’t know. I do plan on selling the Triumph in a few months, so that will, if it sells, generate a few dollars. The totally weird thing was when I called Allstate to take him off as a driver, she said our insurance WILL GO UP ANOTHER $125. WYF??? After talking to our local agent, she got it to go up only $65, so half. The issue is his good driver discount being taken off. JFC, really? Oh well, done is done.

I’ve gotten through most of my list of things to do. There’s still the bank where I need to take him off our account, but I’ll get to it eventually.

As I said, very weird to deal with this stuff. We all miss him so much.

My daughter ordered this from Shutterfly. We hung it out on the upper patio where he spent the last 4 months of his life sitting when the weather was nice.

Frugal wise, I haven’t been spending too much. I did order a new Speedo from Amazon on Prime since I need a new one. I go through a swimsuit about once a year, with the chlorine from the pool. It was 30% off, so it was a good deal. I also bought some black frames for some watercolor pictures my daughter has done, and some that B did too.

I signed my daughter up as a user on my Costco card, so she went in after work and did some shopping. I appreciate the effort. Mostly it was flavored waters, olive oil, coffee, and some wild cod. She’s very susceptible to histamine attacks, so she’s been on a low-histamine diet, hence the fish purchase. The total came to a little over $100.

Our weather is very hot, and the coolers are running most of the day. If I close everything up, I can usually wait till 11 am, and I always turn them off by 8pm, even if it’s still hot out.

I started going to LLS every morning to apply for my grant, but so far, there’s no luck with funding. I’m hoping the wait isn’t too long, as I depend on that money for my insurance.

My son is using B’s truck since his car( older Subaru) is leaking oil. So he got off work early yesterday and took a load to the dump. There are still 2 more to go with metal stuff, and then the old wood from the chicken coop. It was hot yesterday, so I appreciate him doing it and getting it done. I’m pretty sure we’ll keep the truck, but unsure about Rubi. I just don’t know if I can emotionally handle going out in the RV without him. I guess I’ll just have to wait and see when the time comes, and we can plan something. My daughter has volunteered to be the driver, which she can totally handle; it’s more me dealing with it. Plus, Rubi is really designed for a couple, not 2 people. It’s one bed, and the couch does fold down, but it is very uncomfortable to sleep on. So another decision down the road.

Well, that wraps up what’s going on here.

How’s things in your world?? Summer plans?

Friday Things/ Happy 4th or is it for this country?

Posted in California, cancer, husband, peritoneal mesothelomia, Political things, swimming by

I dont really need to go into it any more than that as I’m sure you are all aware of how awful that bill is and how many 17 million people will lose health care. What a travesty. History will tell the tale of this being the worst administration in history. It’s cruelty, racist, white nationalism, harming LGBTQ+, and on and on and on.

I managed another swim so I feel like I’m slowly getting back to some routine. The pool was glorious as it was not busy. I feel I’m floundering with my schedule so I would like to try and figure out a ‘new’ one going forward. I’m also somewhat depressed so I’m not feeling very motivated but hopefully this will pass.

After the pool, I went across the street to Winco and spent $75 some of that was wine for the week ahead. Then I crossed the parking lot and went into Trader Joes. I spent about $100 there but got lots of our favorites. I picked a few frozen meals, hatch chile and macaroni , and their green chile tamales too. I also got eggs, milk, bread and some other basics.

I’ve had some very touching cards from a few people about Barclay but the 2 most endearing were the two people who donated to a tree planting in B’s name. We too are going to plant a tree this fall for him. He loved trees and his BA was in forestry so there’s a link plus all the years he worked part time for the Forest Service were important to him. He was a firefighter for a number of years( starting in 1974) with the Forest Service and we kind of think that may have had a link to him getting the mesothelioma, although know can ever really tell. I think our best guess is it was just a break down of DNA like him getting MDS, a blood cancer. Unfortunately, meso, is a tumor load cancer and therein lies the difficulty with treatment.

I’ve gotten through quite a bit of tasks to be done but there are still more to do which I hope to finish next week.

He was on KVMR radio for 25 years as a broadcaster with his show being all about Dylan. So he has quite a few CD’s of his show so I plan on buying a CD player so I can listen to some. Of course, we had an old CD player that we used for camping but got rid of that when we got Rubi.

A beautiful evening to die.

Posted in California, cancer, Death by

Barclay died at 6:57 on Juneteenth. A fitting day for him as he was all about equality, diversity, and inclusion. He was a conscientious objector during the Vietnam War because of his Quaker beliefs. So Juneteenth was a perfect backdrop.

We were all there ( both kids and I), and it was a cool sunny evening. Death is never pretty, but he died as peacefully as expected.

At some point, we will take his ashes to the Lake Tahoe area and scatter them. There are quite a few things to take care of, but I figure I’ll get to them when I do. We had all the important stuff done, but now there’s still misc like removing him from different accounts and such. I’m not in any hurry, and like I said, I’ll get to it eventually.

I miss him. I guess after being with someone for 55 years, that’s expected. In some ways, we had a storybook life of adventure and travels. Money-wise, we never did that one very well, but here we are.

My daughter was amazing in the last few days, taking care of medication every 2 hours and keeping track of things. The nurses were all impressed with her efficiency. My son is having a harder time with it all, but he’s been here helping do stuff and move things back to where they go since we had a lot of equipment in here. Everyone grieves differently, and I suspect him keeping busy will help him.

Still smiling! He loves his Triumph motorcycle.

Up at Tahoe House in Tahoe City, ca

In healthier times.

Simple Sunday and some updates

Posted in California, cancer, Lake tahoe, Walking by

Today, Father’s Day, would have been the day we left for Tahoe for the week, so that’s a little hard for me. Barclay isn’t all that aware, so I don’t think he remembers.

Things are about the same here, maybe a little worse.

We had hospice come on three different days: one was the intake nurse, one was the RN who would be our nurse, and then the social worker. It was all good, although a bit overwhelming. The nurse set up getting a wheelchair, bedside commode, oxygen, a shower chair, and a walker. So, lots of stuff.

He’s using the oxygen, so that helps some. We’re all taking turns being around so he has someone here. We all gave him his Father’s Day cards this morning, too.

Overall, just being here.

We’ve had simple meals( my daughter and I) like Costco pulled pork on tortillas, salads, hot dogs, and one night just sandwiches.

It’s been nice weather and not too hot at all.

Today, my son is coming up to do some yard work and take some cardboard to recycle. He still needs to plan the dump runs, as there is a lot to take to really clean up around the barn. My daughter has the chicken coop almost all the way down. She’s done an incredible job, really.

I’ve had a few nice walks and am rotating my PT exercises so that continues. My knee seems to be doing better overall all and I’m not using my brace anymore, just a compression sleeve.

This coming week I have Velcade, so that’ll be interesting. My daughter had to change her work week so she could be here for me when I’m gone. I don’t have any plans to go to the pool or the gym till we’re done with hospice. No sense trying to add something else in right now.

I hope your world is a happy one, and on a positive note, the No Kings demonstrations were a huge success. Let’s hope the orange man starts to act like a president.

Midweek Musings

Posted in California, cancer, cooking, hospice, peritoneal mesothelomia by

We met with the hospice intake nurse yesterday. I was so impressed with the efficiency and information. She was so obliging with everything. She made a list of what B needs, like oxygen, a shower chair, etc, and by 5:30 that evening, it was being delivered. I was kind of blown away. They showed us how the oxygen works, so when he needs it, it’ll be there. He hasn’t really needed it yet.

Today, I need to go to town to pick up his medication. All of his meds now will be through hospice, but his pain med had already been filled yesterday. I couldn’t go get it because my daughter headed down to work.

Last night I did the big salad of spring mix, tomatoes, cucumbers, and the leftover polenta. Then I pan-fried the Costco breaded chicken(freezer), which, by the way, is quite good. B ate some polenta and a bit of salad.

The nurse gave us a binder with info and a 24-hour call number if anything comes up. My biggest concern is B falling. Especially because it most likely will be his low blood counts that he will succumb to. When his hemoglobin drops too low, then that’ll probably be it. The drop in hemoglobin will cause him to be even more unsteady.

I’m continuing to putter around the house, and I have a nice little load to go to Goodwill. Any duplicates of things are what I’m focusing on. Also, in the kitchen, I have a number of OXO containers I’m not using and don’t foresee using, so I’m passing those on. As always, I am looking around for ways to streamline the house. It makes it so much easier to tidy up, clean, and maintain.

I hope these days find you well and living your best life. Life can turn on a dime, as they say.

Menu

Posted in California, cancer, cooking, Death, husband, meal planning by

We are eating very light salads and meals.

Sunday night, we had a Greek pasta salad, and B ate some! That made me happy.

Monday- left-over Greek salad, and my daughter made a pan of polenta with herbs and cheese.

Tuesday- something Mexican. I have beans and rice, so I just need to add a protein.

Wednesday- I want to use some pasta (fettuccine from TJ’s) in the freezer. I’ll add grilled chicken or some shrimp.

Thursday- Again, some freezer meal to keep working our way through stuff. Plus, I have a container of spring mix to use for a salad.

Friday- not sure. My son is coming up to get the truck and smog it. He’s spending the night because the next day he’s going to do a dump run. Of course, all this depends on how B is doing.

All in all, we’re keeping it very simple. Nothing too involved. Just simple food.

Anyone who has had cancer or is going through end of life recognizes how small your world becomes. You just don’t go out a lot or even really care about much except what’s next. I’d love to go down to the pool or the gym, but I’ll have to see how each day shapes up. If I can, I’ll try and do something this week.

We did a phone intake with hospice yesterday. It was very thorough, so we’ll see what today brings.

Simple Sunday

Posted in budgets, California, cancer, Death, husband by

First, I want to thank subscriber T for a generous donation to help us through our rough times here. I’m always so humbled that people would consider this at all. Maybe it has to do with feeling insecure about my value or even this blog. But T, thank you for thinking of us.

Another warm day here in N. Ca. I’ve been closing the house down by 8am so the cool stays inside. We turned the coolers on a little earlier yesterday and will again today.

I walked yesterday and today in the park. I’m still not quite up to the .75 mark, but close. I got to .68. No one has been there, which has been very nice. Just me and all the Canada goose families. I’ve done really well this week, not using my cane and trying to walk steadily. I’ve done my PT exercises every other day, and I do think, especially, the ones on the massage table are helping. I just need to keep it up and not think that if my knee feels better to stop.

Now, for some recapping of the situation. B’s doctor said there’s nothing more to do. The PET scan showed disease progression, so the immunotherapy is not doing anything. She was very compassionate about it all. Now we wait for hospice to call us, which should be tomorrow or at least early next week. It is incredibly sad and feels a bit surreal. I’m sure those who have lost a spouse can relate. My son is taking it particularly hard, and I hope he feels he can talk to me. All in all, it really just means waiting, which is also incredibly hard.

We had reservations to go to Tahoe for Father’s Day week, and that will be tough to realize we won’t do that anymore. I haven’t cancelled the reservation yet, probably because of denial. But I will do so this week.

I’m trying to do my ‘normal’ stuff to keep things normal, I guess. Once we meet with hospice, we’ll know more about how to proceed. I don’t have a clue, really.

I hope you out there in blog land are having a Simple Sunday. If you want to share what you’re doing today.

A picture of the coreopsis and a cactus

Frugal Friday

Posted in budgets, California, cancer, frugalism by

I’ve had 3 no-spend days while home this week.

I went to WinCo on Monday and spent about $30 on food. I didn’t need a lot there.

Then Wednesday after Sacramento, I went to Costco. Food was $190. My main reason for going was to get B the shoes(Sketchers) that you just slip on your feet. He’s quite unstable walking, so these have good support. He is using a cane, but still.

I’ll try and avoid grocery stores for a while:)

Today is almost a no-spend day. We are having someone come and finish the weed eating on the lower part of the property. I have a cash envelope for that, though.

I’m planning to go to the gym after he starts. The library doesn’t open till 10 on Fridays, so I don’t need to get there by 9. I need to get gas at Costco too for the coming week. I also have a Goodwill drop-off to do. It’s very convenient since it’s right across from the library/gym. They’re not very friendly, but that doesn’t really matter, I guess.

Some of the first of the month bills are out, but the bulk come out next week.

I’m thinking about a schedule for swimming and the gym. Not sure yet, plus it depends on how B is feeling. Someone needs to be here at all times with him. My daughter has a few work shifts next week, so that will change my schedule.

Yesterday I BBQed some chicken, and so we have some leftovers for lunch today.

I’ll update on Barclay soon. It’s hard to process, so I’m leaving it till I feel I can.